This post doesn't have a fun name.

It's safe to say that I am in a funk. The last month has been kind of a blur, with so much going on - but at the same time, feeling stuck in slow motion. I wrapped up my fourth semester (2 to go!) and am so relieved to be done for a couple of months. But, at the same time, kind of worried about what will go on this summer. Mainly because my kids are crazy. They fight over the craziest things (OMG! Bubba looked at me!) like all kids do, but since I am in a funk right now, it brings me down even more. These are the kinds of days we've been having..

Cameron is still in preschool, that will wrap up on May 22nd. He will have a small graduation ceremony and we will be done with it. He had kindergarten screening 2 weeks ago, and it has been decided that he will go to Young 5s in the fall. Same elementary school as the kindergarten, just a different program for now. I had a conference with his preschool teacher, and the fact that he is younger (by a year in some cases) than all of his classmates is evident. 'He isn't behind, he's just young.' He has a few things to work on, writing his name, coloring, and cutting to be specific, but he is ready to move on to bigger things in the fall. Much like the kindergarten program, Young 5s is an all day thing, meaning he will be gone from a little after 8 in the morning until about 3:30 in the afternoon. It will be strange to be responsible for only Hannah during that time!

Cameron has also recently started t-ball. He hasn't had his first game yet (that's on Saturday!), but he seems to enjoy it so far. Of course, the practices have been more for socializing and not so much learning, so daddy has had to spend some time teaching the basics to him. It is cute to see him out there learning how to play though.

There really isn't much new happening in the world of Hannah. She is deep into the terrible twos, having random breakdowns because things don't go her way, for instance, she doesn't get her arm in her sleeve on the first try? Hysterics. Same goes for putting her shoes on and putting the diaper on her baby doll. There are many days spent with motrin nearby. She got her birthday presents from Grammy early, accessories for her Bitty Baby Petey.

I think it's safe to say she loves that baby. 

Life Changes.

I made this one of my New Years Resolutions in December, but I am now finally back on the diet bandwagon. It's pretty official, thanks to this email:

I am the kind of person who HATES wasting money. I have struggled internally for the past few weeks trying to decide if I should spend the money to join Weight Watchers again. I have had incredible success in the past, but the thought of spending $60 at once makes me cringe. And since I am the kind of person that hates to waste money, I know that by signing up for this and spending that $60, I will stick to it. If I don't, it will make me insane.

The same goes with a gym membership. I was lucky enough to have a membership at the YMCA a year ago that my mom generously paid for, but I eventually stopped going. I was bored of the whole concept and decided that a cheeseburger and a coke sounded much more appealing than an hour at the gym. A few months later, I joined a different gym, one that was super cheap, but again, issues. It was in an inconvenient location, they didn't offer childcare, etc. So I quit going there too. Ugh. This is becoming a pattern now. Well, as of last Thursday, I am once again a member of the local YMCA. It is going to be pretty expensive to go there, but the perks of being able to go whenever I want and having someone available there to watch my kids (for $1 each time. Yes, just $1. For 2 kids. For 2 hours.) make it so very worth it.

So come along, once again, on my never ending weight loss experience. It has been about 2.5 years since I started this whole thing, and I am embarrassed to say that I have ridden a rollercoaster this entire time, really great highs (low numbers on the scale) and scary dips back to my old habits. But this time? I'm holding myself accountable and finally getting healthy. If not for me, definitely for my family. I want nothing more than to be around and with them for a long time. These are just the first steps.

It's been awhile.

I'm still here! I don't know what my problem is, but good grief. Life has gotten busy, guys!

Things are all pretty much the same around here.

Cameron is about 2 months away from graduating from preschool. His school year has flown by and if you ask me, he has certainly benefited from going to preschool. He had a round of testing in December and the teacher is doing it again right now, so we will be able to tell based on that how much he has improved throughout the school year. Speaking of school, on Tuesday night, Josh and I went to a parent meeting at his elementary school. You read that right, ELEMENTARY school. It doesn't seem possible that this little guy is going to be a full-day student in the fall, but he is. :tears: He will be tested by the school in April to determine whether he will be going to young 5s or kindergarten, but either way, he will spend 5 full days a week at school. It will be an adjustment for me and Hannah, but it is very exciting!

Hannah could technically go to preschool in the fall, but she would have to be potty trained, and since I am mother of the year, I can admit that she is not potty trained yet. She will be 3 in July and has had major successes in this area, but with everything else going on in daily life (my school, Cameron's school, SO MUCH DRIVING), we haven't had time. This summer, though, will be the end of diapers in our household. Woot! This girl is a complete chatterbox and talks ALL THE TIME. Somedays, it gets to be so much that I have to ask her to please whisper or go talk in another room. She is a naughty little thing, always getting into everything she knows she's not supposed to. She's lucky she's so cute.

In other news, I celebrated my 27th birthday this week. It depresses me that the number on the end of that 20 is getting so high, lol. I don't want to turn 30! I remember being 18 and feeling like 30 was so far away, and then I blinked and now I'm so close. I'm working really hard to do good things with my life, so I can be proud of who I am and what I've done. One day at a time, I suppose! I'm still in school, with 2 semesters remaining until I get an associates degree. I'm taking it one semester at a time, trying not to overwhelm myself with what lies ahead. It will be worth it in the end, which is about a year from now. Can't complain!

Until next time!

New Years Resolutions

I have made New Years Resolutions in the past, but never really stuck to them. Life gets in the way, or I just became lazy and decided that my resolutions were stupid. Well, in an effort to improve myself, I am going to list a few of my resolutions and hope I can stick to them.

1) It's something I have struggled with for about 7 years, but I want to get myself down to a healthy weight again. I've had some really great stretches, getting myself within 15 pounds of my goal weight, and then awful setbacks where I gain all the weight back again. I've done Weight Watchers, and had great success, but when money is tight, that is not something that is high on the spending priority list.

Me at my largest, just before Hannah was born.

Me in summer of 2005, in the bright pink shirt.

Most recent picture of me. Christmas 2012.

My friend has been working on a plan to take baby steps towards a realistic goal, and I think I am going to do the same. If we go slowly, there is less room for failure. 

2) Become a better parent. I will admit it, I am not the best mother in the world. My kids, like every other, are flawed. There are many more bad days than there are good (between the fighting, hitting, screaming, crying, etc.), but they are kids. I sometimes have a hard time remembering that. There will be messes, there will be struggles. These are things I need to remember. 2 and 4 year olds do not realize that grabbing something the wrong way will probably cause a ginormous mess. Or that pouring their own glass of milk while mom is in the shower is probably not the best idea. What I need to realize is that messes can be cleaned up. Being hard on your kids for stupid reasons is not a good way to build a relationship. I do not want to be the kind of parent that has a terrible relationship with their children. I do not want them to fear me. I do not want them to go through their teenage years hating me, counting down the days until they get to leave my house. Again, this will probably involve baby steps. 

3) Continue my education. I have completed 3 semesters, and have 3 to go, and am so far thrilled with my progress. 13 classes down, and all but one completed with a 4.0 (that pesky 3.5 will haunt me forever). It has not been easy, juggling kids, school work, a once a week job, but it will eventually be worth it. It has been exciting for me to prove to myself that if I put my mind to it, I can achieve it. When I was a senior in high school, I didn't care about grades or college. I was more worried about boys and having fun, and picking up my life and moving it across the country. Looking back now, I wish I would have gone to college right away. But when you're 18 years old, you don't always do the right things. 

So, what do you think? Doable? I really hope so. The past few years haven't been stellar, but they haven't been awful either. I am hoping that 2013 rolls in and will be the best year that I've had in awhile. 

Happy New Year to you all!

Oh, hai!

Remember me?

I'm still around! Life has been hectic. Cameron goes to school, I go to school, I clean a house on Thursdays.. Yeah. Hectic. Not to mention, Christmastime? Yeah. Life in overload. But, for the next 2 weeks, I am free from my school, and next week will be spent at home with no trips to preschool or to the house I clean, so life will be good. I'm kind of excited about the idea of jammies all day long. 

Speaking of Christmas, we're ready! Christmas cards were mailed weeks ago (I'm talking days after Thanksgiving), packages have been mailed for family and secret Santa draws, and our tree is bursting at the seams on December 20th. Let's not forget that we haven't put our presents out for the kids, and neither has Santa. These kids have so many people in their lives that love them. :)

Fall 2012 semester wrapped up last week, and I am proud to add four more 4.0s to my transcript. My GPA remains at 3.98, but that is still something to be very proud of! 

The next few days are consumed with Christmas parties and family get togethers and a teeny tiny bit of snow. I am probably the only person in SW Michigan who would prefer a green/brown Christmas, but it appears that I will get my wish. Yay! When you have as many places to go as we do, we kind of appreciate nice, clean, and dry roads. 

Until next time, Happy Holidays!

Shutterfly Giveaway Winner.

Congratulations, Robert Tuesley! Enjoy your Christmas cards!

It's that time again..

Believe it or not, folks, Christmas is just a little more than 2 months away. What?! It honestly seems like I just took down my decorations and got rid of the snow. 

I don't know about you, but one of my most favorite holidays is Christmas. I love the atmosphere, the decorations, the food, shopping (especially on Black Friday), and just about everything BUT the snow. ;)   I absolutely love Christmas trees and Christmas music and look forward to the day after Thanksgiving (I try to respect the bird!) so I can get all my stuff around. 

For the past 2 years, I have worked with Shutterfly to produce the Christmas cards my family sends out. I have been so pleased with what I've received and love sending the cards out to my friends and family. I absolutely love the Christmas Photo Cards  that are offered from Shutterfly. The quality is amazing and the pictures look so crisp and clear. We are always receiving compliments on them as people start getting them in the mail.

The cards offered by Shutterfly are surprisingly affordable for the quality you get. They have great deals year round on their products as well. Visit this link to check out their Special Offers page.

AWESOME ALERT! If you are interested in winning a $50 credit towards Christmas cards on Shutterfly's website, leave a comment with your name and I will enter your name into the contest. (The giveaway will end on October 26th!)

I look forward to seeing what everyone comes up with for Christmas cards this year! Ho ho ho!

*this post is sponsored by Shutterfly*